I cant believe that summer has started already. The last two weeks I have been wondering where the first part of the year went, and then I look back at all my journals and blogs and realize, oh yeah that’s what I did and what I was feeling and where God has been leading me. It really has been a journey that I will never forget and one that will have changed who I am for a life time.
Our first summer group was really awesome! I had four occupational therapy students working with me and I have never seen so much progress in those kids in just two short weeks! They taught me so much about what OT really is and skills that I can use for the rest of the summer, I am so excited about that! These kids mean so much to me and seeing even just a little progress makes my day.
As a whole I think that I am doing really good right now. There are some things that I am struggling with and trying not to think about to much, like the fact that there are only nine more weeks left. Being here has become such a huge part of my life. it’s a place where I have fallen in love with the culture and people and thinking about leaving has my heart in this weird place. I want to enjoy the time that I have left here and not be thinking about this, and take in everyday and let God show me more of Him. Its also a very busy summer. There are very few days that we get off and that doesn’t really bother me, I like to keep busy, and doing the work that I am doing here is exactly what I am supposed to be doing right now and I enjoy it. Last night we had just a worship night around a campfire, and it is things like that where God continues to amaze me and surprise me with His love and grace and beauty.
I think what it really is, is that I am on this high-low right now, where God is so much present in my life and seeing the changes that He is making in me, but there is this thing in the back of my mind that might be fear. Kind of a fear of the unknown, of what is going to happen in August, when I go home, fear of going home, of not giving it my all these next couple of months. I know that this has been there since the beginning but it is just coming out in full force for some reason these past few weeks. I know that God has it all under control and there is no need for me to fear about what is going to happen. It will happen and it will be Gods plan. What is really funny is that each of us interns have been assigned a word to do a little three minute message on, and mine is "fear". I really did want to study this, maybe mostly in the beginning so that I don’t mess it up when I actually have to give this message, but there were some passages that really convicted me. I really have to check myself and completely trust God. All in all it is a trust issue.
I know that it is going to be a great summer. I mean how can it not be with all the wonderful people God has put in my life right now. Yep that would be you interns and volunteers, Vicki and Josh, and many more! So I am going into this next week with a new attitude I have decided. I mean there will always be the fact that I am going home in August but I don’t want to miss something here that God is trying to teach me because I am fearful of the future and everything else. Psalm 34:4 "I sought the Lord, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears."
